SATC2

For years I have defended one of my favorite shows, Sex and the City, from many, many people who said it was garbage. These critics said it was shallow, unbelievable, immoral, etc. etc. But I stood by Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte like they were family. I praised the show for its insightfulness, and for the fact that so many women could relate to it. I spent countless hours watching, and re-watching every episode. I cried like a baby when Carrie and Big finally got together. I bought the entire DVD set and didn't even blink when it cost me over $200.

So imagine my delight when, a few years after the show ended, the first movie came out. It wasn't great, but I still loved it. I felt like I was checking in on my girls after a few years without seeing them. The movie was like a mature version of the show, and rightfully so, as years had passed before its premier. Some people didn't like it because it was "depressing," but I thought the depressing parts were what gave it it's strength and made it more down to earth. The wedding blowup aside, there was nothing over-the-top about the first movie besides the girls' clothing, which is what made the show so great in the first place.

About 2 weeks ago, Sex and the City 2 came out. I'd first read about the sequel in some magazine about a year ago, then the previews proved the rumors true, and I could not have been more excited. About a week after it came out, I, with wings on my feet, flew to the theater to see it and...
IT. WAS. TERRIBLE.

Unbearable, actually.
I almost left the theater halfway through. I checked my watch and my phone countless times (which my friends tell me is a sure sign that I'm bored/ edgy), and didn't even care that the theater I was in served alcohol. No wine goggles could make that movie good. It was tacky, cliche, and just tired.
The trailer teases you with Jay-Z's "Empire State of Mind," but only about a fifth of the movie actually takes place in New York. The rest of it is spent in Abu Dhabi, a setting which, like the entire movie, is just ridiculous.

The series itself is like Seinfeld for materialists; it follows the lives of four "fabulous" women who live in New York. Sure their lives have ups and downs, but for the most part (shoe fetishes and sexual encounters aside), the show is not very dramatic, and fairly laid-back. Nothing extraordinary happens, usually. There are no zany antics, no slapstick humor.

Sex and the City 2 however, is za-a-a-ny, full of shenanigan after shenanigan. The ladies drive around in Maybachs, ride camels, get arrested, and worst of all, sing karaoke. And I'm not talking drunk, Cameron Diaz in My Best Friend's Wedding karaoke- theres' was supposed to be "spontaneous" but in reality was quite choreographed, they all sang in harmony, and, worst of all, the song of choice was "I am Woman." Oh, wait- I take that back- the worst part of all was that of course, every woman in the night club where they sang joined in, stood up, and made gestures of feminine strength. Ew.

The show itself was watched and loved by thousands of people for all seven years of its existance. I understand that movies are fundamentally different than tv shows, but why dramatically alter the style of a show that was so good to make a movie that is so bad? The entire thing could have taken place in New York. The trip to Abu Dhabi was distracting and unnecessary. Carrie's eye makeup was over the top and the joke about Charlotte having a camel toe while riding an actual camel, well, let's not even go there.

It feels blasphemous to be so negative about this film after years of total adoration of the tv show. But there's just no way around it. Ebert was generous to give it even one star.
"If it ain't broke, don't fix it," and please, don't break it.


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