The building that my store is in is owned by the same family that owns Al Johnson's Swedish restaurant which is just across the street. Al's is known for the goats which graze on its roof and for the dirndls (traditional Swedish Dress/apron thing) which the waitresses must wear. The mastermind behind all this is Al's wife, Ingert, who was born in Sweden. And just to prove it, she wears a dirndl every second of every day. Though she stands at just 5 ft tall and weighs no more than 100 lbs, she is the most frightening woman I have ever met. Any time I cross her path (which happens many times a day because she is constantly running around their property watering plants and tidying up EVERY inch), her one good eye bores into my soul disapprovingly, and makes me feel utterly American and worthless. Thankfully, her other eye, lazily rolls into space.
The most charming aspect of her character is the fact that she cannot spell and she has a skewed understanding of English grammar and punctuation. I know this because she tapes signs all over the building full of misspellings and other hilarious errors.
For your viewing pleasure, here are some from the staff bathroom:
1 comment:
Funny that you posted this today...
Dr. McLendon ordered a bunch of LED curing lights for our office. A normal wand starts at about $700. The one my grandpa has was $2500. Raymond got his, from CHINA for $175. Today I read the manual:
"Dropping the light without permission causes the mangle."
"When light conks out, the charging is necessary."
"If the light is not green, you must circumvolve the pin."
There was also a sentence I cannot remember because it was literally one of those sentences from an email ad that tries to circumvent the spam filter.
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